It's like a bad train wreck... I have to watch

So at the end of the last season of the Bachelor with Jake, I made a promise. This promise was simple-I would no longer waste my time or brain cells with this stupid show. I was doing really well in keeping this promise, until 2 weeks into this seasons Bachelorette with Ali.
I hate her. I really do. She annoys me to no end. She keeps loser guys, has bad extensions, and the worst fake laugh I have ever heard. Seriously it's like hyena with a cold, and I want to smack her. Who knew I had such a violent personality.

Last night I had the unfortunate experience of watching this with my mom. It was great to spend some quality time with mom. But, I wish we would have been doing something a little more productive like playing Yahtzee.

I have a few comments regarding this last episode.


1. Who does weatherman think he is? Lurking in the background. Look little gay man. Come to terms with who you are and stop being a freak. Good luck getting a date after this show, now the whole world (note-I sometimes exaggerate) knows you are freaky. P.S. I don't care what forecast you say, it will never ever be hot where you are, just saying.



2. Ali I am sorry that you were sick. But, please don't kiss boys when you are on your dying on your bed. Let them give you a little peck on the cheek and then send them on their way. Nobody wants to see you get your "mack" on while you are on your death bed. I question the sanity of the boys that actually kissed you while you were sick.


3. Dude, who got a tattoo. I do believe the psych ward has an opening in room 9. Don't walk, run there. You need all the help you can get. I understand you were trying to "prove your commitment" to her but in my opinion (which is obviously the only right one-look it's my blog alright) permanent ink should wait until you are actually paying for dates yourself instead of mooching off of ABC. I have read reality Steve, and I know you don't last until the end. What are you going to do with that tat? Pretend you did it for the next girl you date, I am sure she will love the shield that is protecting Ali's er I mean her heart. I think she'll know what really happened.


4. Rated R. You creep me out. We all know you are up to something. Do you just moonlight as a wrestler or is that really your job?





I am sad to report that I will be most likely, who am I kidding, I will be watching next weeks episode. Do you watch this show? What do you think or this season?

Man oh man...

I wouldn't kick him out of bed for eating cookies. I would probably join him.

Am I the only one that thinks a little scruff is sexy?

Today

I am ex.haust.ed!!
The end!

All in all it was a success

Vegas was awesome!!! Day 1- I got my pina colada, and a salad that changed my life for the better. My room got upgraded to a room with a view for free. I think he just told me that to make me feel special, and you know what it worked. Because of that I spent a whole 10 min longer than I normally would have looking at the swimmers. I was wishing I was brave enough to bare my white white skin and winter body.

Day 2- Had rehearsal and was serenaded (does it count as serenading if its rap?) the unknown songs of Sir Mix A lot, by the teleprompter guy. Saw the battle of passed out drunk man vs. door. The final score was Door-1, Man-0. I realized that most men that go to club TAO have forgotten what decade it is, and that in 2010 it is not socially acceptable to wear your shirt 3/4 of the way unbuttoned. Likewise, most girls who attend club TAO got ripped off when buying their dresses. Most of them were in over sized shirts. Finally got some gelato; it was heavenly!

Day 3- Got up at o'dark thirty for a 5K. Who plans a 5K at 6 am? Saw the runners take off and then had security drive me to McDonald's to get a diet coke. It. Was. Awesome! From there we had oh about 10 min to change into our suits and head over to the event. Hung out back stage for many many hours without sufficient food. Luckily, our security guys rock and they kept me entertained and supplied with diet coke. After the sessions ended (2 hours late) we went to some parties. One in the Paris, we tried to go to one in Planet Hollywood, but it was canceled. We then headed to the Palazzo, this party was my fav. The suite there rocked. One day when I am a millionaire (cough don't hold your breathe cough cough) I would like to throw soiree's for my friends there. We ended the night at Bally's.

Day 4- Barely made my flight, sat next to teleprompter guy, who kept me entertained the whole way home. Rushed to church and was there for the remainder of the day.

I am still trying to catch up, but tomorrow I will write a more entertaining post (cough don't count on it cough cough).

Viva Las Vegas

I am getting ready to go sin city for work.
I leave tomorrow morning; return on Sunday. I hope I am able to find some time for a little fun.

My list of goals are:
1. To not get married, but if I do to have an attorney who will be able to pull off a 24 hr annulment. (I kid, I kid)
2. To not get a tattoo-This is not really a temptation, I needed an easy goal.
3. To meet Elvis- Maybe he can officiate at the wedding. (see #1)
4. To drink a virgin pina colada from the Bellagio-They are the best, I am not lying.
5. Maybe find myself a pirate man at the Treasure Island show (See #1).
6. I am sure there are many more, but I don't have time to think of them right now.

Have a great weekend ya'll!